What We Were
by ModPucca
Summary: "We were many things. We were friends. We were lovers. We were enemies. Those memories will stay with me for a long time, Joseph. Don't think I'll forget about you any time soon." A small collection of drabbles about Cartaphilus/Joseph and the reader's time spent together.
1. Thank You

**"Thank you."**

Out of nowhere, they came. Joseph, startled by the sudden thanks, stared at the person lying before him with confusion in his eyes. He couldn't understand why they were thanking him, especially now of all times.

"You made my life a little better."

 _Better?_ How could they say that? No, no! This isn't want Joseph wanted to hear. Not now! Not when...

" **Don't blame yourself.** This was going to happen at one point in our lifetime, so I'm not sad."

Why would he _not_ blame himself when he was the reason they were lying in a pool of their own blood? They were dying because of him, and the only words they could utter were words of thanks? Words that told him they weren't upset with him? That they forgave him? He couldn't understand it. He wouldn't understand it.

"You look so pale, Joseph... Are you okay?"

"How can you ask me that _now_? You should be worried about bleeding out, and yet you're asking about my health instead. I'll never understand your actions, young one," Joseph responded, shoving his hands into the pockets of his overcoat and averting his gaze for a moment before returning his stare to their body.

As if to mask his emotions, the wizard's expression became stoic and void. This was his way of dealing with unwanted and unnecessary feelings. He would pretend they didn't exist until they boiled over, then he would explode and take it out on those around him.

"Don't make that face at me, now, Joseph. That's not the last thing I want to see before I return to the earth." Their voice grew weaker and weaker by the minute.

Joseph gave no response, choosing to simply stare as their life force slowly drained away, leaving the fae's body to fade into dust.

The lonely reality of what he had done would haunt him for the rest of his days.


	2. Lionhearted

When he first met you, things were strange. They were different.

You were rougher, more violent. You lashed out at everyone around you with such ferocity that others became afraid to approach you. It's no surprise that you were astonished when a stray wizard offered to become your friend out of no where.

" _Friend?_ " you spat. "You barely even know me! We _just_ met!"

But he assured you that he was being honest. He truly wanted to be your friend. He'd heard the rumors and gossip about you, you were sure. He _had_ to be some kind of lunatic if he seriously sought you out in hopes of befriending you. Maybe he wanted to gain your trust, so he could kill you and use your body parts for shady magic. That's what _you_ thought, anyway.

( _And maybe you weren't too far off, looking back on it. He did turn out to be a lunatic later on, and you weren't so sure he didn't have ulterior motives during this first encounter._ )

"You must be thinking that I'm _crazy_ , right? You suspect me of having an ulterior motive because no one could _ever_ want to be friends with someone as unfriendly as you. _Correct?"_

It was like he'd read your mind.

You studied his face for any signs of malice or deception, but all you were met with was a pleasant smile and closed eyes. A small laugh escaped from his lips as you observed him.

You couldn't help but notice how angelic his face looked when he smiled like that. Was it even _possible_ for a human to make such a pure expression?

 _"_ — _Well?"_

You were jolted back from your thoughts as the wizard spoke. Taking note of your little jump, he giggled once more and held out his hand. _He was talking this whole time? Crap!_

When you only continued to stare at his hand in confusion, the man sighed. " _Friendship,"_ he prompted. "Are we going to be friends or not?"

You were silent for a moment, mulling over the situation. When you finally came to your conclusion, you hesitantly grabbed hold of his hand and shook it.

 **"I've got nothing to lose."**


	3. Mistletoe

This was _his_ fault. The fact that you were stuck here at a dusty, old desk, inspecting a stupid piece of mistletoe, was all his fault. 

"Hey, [Name]," Joseph called out. "What do you think about Christmas?" 

The question came out of no where. Was he trying to distract you from your job? After he had asked you earlier to study this damn parasitic plant for magical qualities since he apparently couldn't do it? _Asshole._

"I don't like it," was your simple answer. You wanted to leave it at that, so you could finish your work and leave. 

"Oh~? Why not?" You felt your brow twitch. "I thought you were the kind of person who would love anything festive, [Name]." _Where did he get that idea?_

"Joseph, I hate Christmas. It's a stupid thing humans use to excuse greed." _Maybe that'll shut him up._

"Oh, I see... That's a very pessimistic outlook on life, [name]!" he remarked as he dropped what he was doing and turned to look at you, one hand on his hip. "No wonder people avoid you."

Your frown deepened.

"That pessimistic attitude of yours is exactly what makes everyone dislike you, [Name]! They can't stand how negative and rude you are."

Your hands clenched.

"Not to mention how violent you can get. You know, I've feared for my life a couple of times, [Name]! You really scare me when you're angry. Did your parents raise you to be such a monster?"

You slammed the mistletoe onto the desk with a loud _"SLAP!"_ and whirled around in your chair to stare at Joseph. There he stood, no signs of malice visible on his face. Just a large, innocent-enough smile. Hell, most people would have been fooled into thinking he was just joking around or that he was just trying to help you with your flaws, but you knew him better than most people.

"Now, now! Don't get so angry, [Name]. I'm only telling you the truth, you know," Joseph chastised as he approached you with little caution. "I'm doing this to help you," he cooed. "Don't you want my help~?"

"Currently? I don't want anything you're selling, **Cartaphilus,** " you spat. _Who does he think he is? Stupid bastard!_

The next thing you knew, you were being ripped from your seat with one hand around your throat, then you were being slammed against a wall. Pain shot throughout your body as you let out a loud, pained gasp. You had forgotten about your companion's inhuman strength.

 **"Don't call me that."**


	4. Diary Entry

**How would I describe the being I fell in love with?** He's cold. Lonely. But his company is enjoyable, like a cool Winter breeze on your morning walk.

His eyes light up when we talk about his interests, just like any other person. He's passionate and fun-loving, and he has a sense of curiosity that I've never seen in anyone else. He frequently asks about my day, how I've been doing, what I'm feeling...

Many people would say he's an eccentric or a lunatic with no morals. Of course, it's normal for humans to say that about those they don't understand, isn't it? If they vilify the weird and the unknown, then they won't have to learn about it. _Humans can be so terrifying..._

I was once told that the one I love had been born a human, but he denies his humanity when I ask him about it. I must admit, he has me curious about his past as he hardly talks about it at all. It pains me to think he may have suffered something so terrible that he wishes not to speak of it. Who could have hurt this man, and why would they do so? He may not be the most innocent of lambs or the most morally pure of the humans, but even Joseph deserves basic decency.

 **So, let me tell you about the love of my life.**

He is cruel to others, but kind to me. He is curious and passionate, but fickle and unpredictable. A capricious man with an ever-lasting interest in the unknown and a talent for charming his way into the hearts of others. I know nothing of his past, but I know of the present, and I should hope I know of our future.


End file.
